Most seducers, as one, say that seducing a girl is very, very easy. But keeping a relationship with her is difficult. However, it’s quite easy to keep or keep the girl next to you, if you even understand a little about female psychology.
When your relationship begins, you see the reciprocal love and desire of the girl to invest emotionally in you. It seems to you that these relations are doomed to a bright future, and that everything will be fine with you.
True, ignorance of female psychology and what is needed in the relationship of your soulmate can lead to the destruction of relationships.
I can assume that you are used to constant investments in a girl. Money, time and emotions. Therefore, many of the tips from this article may seem unusual to you. However, our many years of experience in communicating with women and building relationships with them has shown that it is these rules of conduct with the opposite sex that help maintain a really strong relationship.
So read and learn!
Make her invest in you
The first question that arose in your head: “How will I make her invest in me, even if the girl herself is used to my investments?”
Quite a fair question on your part!
True, it’s not so difficult to switch to another mode of relations when it invests more in you than you do in it.
First of all, ask her to do something for you. It can be any little things: hold your purse while you tie the shoelaces, or help you cut the food / set the table when you are preparing dinner.
Secondly every time express approval of any of its investments (temporary, emotional and material). Thank her for this with words or a smile, say that she is well done, since she helps you in everything. Moreover, thank her for any initiatives in your direction. If she became the initiator of the meeting, then praised her for this, saying that many girls are afraid to take the initiative, and she is smart that she is not afraid.
After some time, you will be surprised at how much she began to do for you.
And when she invests in you, then your value in her eyes grows very quickly and powerfully. Accordingly, you do not even have to hold the girl, because she herself wants to be with you.
A little more about how to make a girl invest in you, we have already said here.
Show that you value her
This is another element of your girlfriend’s training when you show that you value her. You can ask evaluative questions, gradually forming her feeling that you are the one who chooses, not her.
Or you can show that you have a bad mood after some of her words or actions. Moreover, it is not necessary that these actions be directed towards you. And when she notices the decline in your mood and asks what happened, you will have an occasion to gently explain to her that you did not expect such behavior from her.
Although it is possible without a reason ...
No matter how beautiful your relationship is now, no matter how loving and caring it may seem to you, sooner or later your good attitude will begin to bother her.
It is for this reason that many guys with a “constant” good attitude towards a girl eventually begin to see a girl lose interest and desire to continue the relationship.
To prevent this from happening, you first need to start playing this game. If for a long time you treated her well, now you can cool slightly. Slightly more rare calls and SMS on your part, not so much a desire to maintain communication, as it was yesterday, etc. You yourself will feel how much you can afford to "cool" to it, so as not to go too far.
To her questions about what happened, say that everything is normal, and that this is a temporary bad mood.
From time to time it is necessary to arrange such “shakes” in order to rekindle her feelings.
As you know, this inaccessibility should manifest itself on your part. You should not try to devote all your time only to her. Since the more free time you give to her, the higher the risk of losing her attraction.
Even in an existing relationship, and even when you are doing well with her, sometimes you need to make sure that she misses you a little.
Positive emotions and diversity
Surprise her, have unusual dates and try to diversify your personal life in every way. If you used to go to the movies often, now start having fun in a different way. Start trying new poses in sex.
Get a new hobby for yourself. Start living in a new way. If you have long wanted to go in for some kind of sport, then do it right now. She must see a new you.
Why did I write these tips at the very end of the article?
Because even if you arrange various and interesting dates for her, introduce something new, but do not introduce other tips, this will not be enough. All previous tips are equally important and require mandatory implementation in your relationship.
Otherwise, your union may crack.
The main thing - do not be afraid to apply all of the above. If at some points you won’t know how to use this or that advice, then with experience everything will change for the better. You will begin to feel how inaccessible you have to be in each specific situation and how much you can “cool down” so that your feelings are kindled even more. In the meantime, just get started neatly sample.
Why are relationships so fragile
A long relationship is not easy to maintain - it is a well-known fact. This is evidenced by both everyday experience and a lot of scientists, sociologists and just smart people. Starting a relationship is quite simple - there are quite a few techniques for attracting a person of interest, but it is criminally little attention that is paid to the preservation of relations.
If a man is truly in love, he is ready for a serious relationship. The first thing to do is to separate “love” and “falling in love”. When two people only get to know each other and start dating, they still do not need to think about how to maintain a long relationship. Certain chemical processes occur in their brain, which cause euphoria, familiar to many.
These processes usually last no more than three years, so that they are in a relationship - usually the most calm. But after three years, when the original passes, a lot of unpleasant features pop up, which begin to annoy. Sometimes this happens earlier, especially if before that the couple met exclusively, and then came together. So how to maintain a long relationship?
How did the relationship begin?
First of all, you need to remember how the relationship began? Surely there was something unifying, which helped to arouse friendliness? It could be anything - common hobbies, joint sports, hiking or even the same lifestyle. If this something is irrevocably gone, it means either you need to radically change something, or end the relationship.
Many people completely forget how important normal relationships are in strong relationships. For some reason, many in pairs hide various information from a partner or simply do not share thoughts and experiences. This creates a certain distinction between people, resulting in distrust and quarrels, which often cause a break in relations.
Moreover, it is important not only to discuss the most basic everyday issues, such as purchases, repairs or work, but to thoroughly share with your partner all your feelings and internal problems. With this ability to listen is as necessary as telling - if you do not have enough patience, then you need to change something.
Despite the fact that the period of romantic falling in love passes, often very quickly, it is important not to lose this atmosphere and maintain it, contrary to routine and everyday life. The easiest way has been known for a long time - flowers, small gifts and other signs of attention.
In addition, once a week it is advisable to spend leisure time together and in a quality manner - going to a restaurant or taking a long walk in a park without any goals or obligations will bring a fresh stream to a stagnant relationship.
It is important that this does not turn into a routine - the same place can be chosen for a birthday or anniversary of a wedding or a meeting, but if you visit them too often, they will probably get bored quickly. Do not be lazy to plan your leisure time in advance.
An important element may be gifts. Despite the poor reputation of materialism in recent years, for relationships this can be a real panacea. It's not only about gifts for important dates, although here we must not forget that all the girls are different and in each case an individual approach is needed, but also about cute irregular little things.
It is good if the gift emphasizes the individuality of the girl, but often you can do just a bouquet of your favorite flowers - this is not very expensive and will allow you to maintain a long relationship.
The key to any good relationship is mutual respect. You can’t treat your partner like a rag and expect good results. Long relationships cannot hold on to violence - this is a law that has been tested for centuries.
We release the girl from household chores
Often a girl has all the household chores, even if they work on an equal footing with men. As a result, much more free time is freed up for men, which looks dishonest and causes various conflicts - in this case, it is useful to take away part of the duties, which will help to untie the girl’s hands and relieve the accumulated tension.
In addition, a calm and rested person, regardless of gender, is much more prone to discuss problems and household matters, which will also be a huge plus.
Even well-established couples too often forget about such a simple thing as “living together.” If two people live together, then both should leave some mark on the house - these can be both small elements of decor, and cardinal things, such as choosing a wallpaper or the color of a kitchen set. In addition, this provokes partners to dialogue and discussion, which will become a brilliant hardening for future conflict relations.
Sex is a very important part of any serious relationship. Often partners get bored with each other, which leads to tension, and, often, to cheating. Both partners are always to blame for treason - not everyone can resist the temptation, but not everyone is ready to try something new for the sake of a partner. It is precisely in the latter that the problem lies.
Often you need to step over yourself and open up some secret fantasy of the partner - this will not only raise the mood for the second member of the couple, but also bring a fresh stream into the relationship. Often this means that one of the partners will no longer have to hide something, hide something deep into themselves, which can only mean positive things.
Partners cannot be ignored, no matter how trivial they seem. The fact that for some it is a trifle, for another it is the whole world. For example, modern society is often too aggressively imposing standards of beauty, so that even very pretty girls begin to doubt their "suitability", including after the wedding.
The lack of participation in the problems on the part of the partner can both reduce self-esteem, which is also a problem, and lead to serious conflicts and quarrels, it is impossible to get out of them without certain losses. Therefore, it is so important to make small compliments and it is so important to say warm words exactly sincerely whenever a fatal question about appearance sounds.
This applies not only to appearance - such things as hobbies, family problems are often ignored. And sometimes you just listen to gossip.
Remember the old story
Even if you just started dating, you probably already have memories that concern only the two of you. It may be a ridiculous story from the past that happened when you have not met. For example, when you walked in the park late in the evening, and you had to run away from stray dogs, hoping not to be bitten (we hope that you did not have to worry about this).
It is these points of contact that will help overcome the awkwardness and embarrassment that occurs at the very beginning of a relationship.
Don't be afraid to be friend
Girls want the guy to be more open and sociable with them, as with their friends. Do not be afraid to seem intrusive to her, write more often (but still do not overload her phone with minute notifications).
If it happened that you did not communicate for a couple of days, the unexpected message from you will be perceived by her as a pleasant surprise. If you can’t think of anything other than “How was your day?” - just go online. So many things happen during the day (not even necessarily funny). Just share this with her, joke, or seriously ask her opinion.
Dedicate her to your affairs
Whatever your message, it always says to your girlfriend: “Hey, I think about you.” Therefore, you can not try to seem too witty, sitting for hours on a message that should interest her.
Just tell her about the funny dog you saw today. Or retell a strange dream, even if in it you steal her car. Any story told by you as if says: “Listen, I’m living life here, join in.”
Remember, you don’t always have to be funny. It is important to make it clear to your girlfriend that you want to devote her to your affairs, no matter how boring they may be (just do not overwork her).
Once you have stopped in your development and self-improvement, you can assume that you have already lost it.
Girls love promising men. Which set goals and go towards them. Those who do not wallow for days on the couch with a beer, but get up an hour earlier and go to the gym.
You do not have to sit in the same position for five years, receiving a meager salary. Develop in terms of a career, reach new heights, change the scope of activity, if necessary.
Do everything so that you yourself can be proud of yourself.
Do not forget about sports. Of course, your girlfriend loves you not for appearance. But, believe me, she will be much more pleasant to touch your sports pumped up body than a beer tummy.
Do not lower the bar, keep all your promises, or don’t give it at all, don’t turn into henpecked and amoeba.
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Women are very sensual natures. And, no matter how much you meet, they will always expect from you a romantic dinner, a spontaneous trip, an invitation to a date or a sweet surprise at home.
As soon as your girlfriend stops receiving all this, thoughts will come into her head that you are not going smoothly. To prevent this, do not forget about the pleasant things.
Sometimes invite her to dinner (without children and friends) only together. Remember how you spent time when you just started dating. Come back in those days, chat with her. And not about work / home, but try to get to know her better, get to know her again. Bring flowers sometimes, give compliments. To make the girl feel loved.
In a relationship with you, she should not be bored. Do not forget to give her bright and unforgettable emotions. Do not spend every evening at home. Such a lifestyle will drive any person crazy.
And no matter how the girl loves you, one day she will get bored with all this. Do not forget to make her cool dates, which will be different from each other.
Let her get adrenaline on a date with you, a new charge. Give her a certificate for a parachute jump, go to the amusement park, buy weekend tickets to another city.
4. Be a man.
In your relationship you are in charge and you are in charge. It is this awareness that can hold your girlfriend with you for many years to come.
To find a person who is responsible for his words, is responsible, surrounds with care and attention - for a girl it is quite difficult. If you possess such qualities, then your chances are great.
Be firm and adamant with her. Show that she can be naughty anywhere, but not with you.
It may seem too practical to you, but every girl wants a person next to her who will share household and financial responsibilities. As soon as you stop performing your direct masculine functions, a woman will notice this.
You must not forget that relationships are not only pleasure and joy, but also work, moreover, daily.
5. Take care of your life.
If your social circle has declined beyond recognition, and you spend all your free time only with her, it’s bad.
A man who has nothing but a girl in life quickly becomes boring.
There is nothing to talk about with him, he cannot bring something new to the girl’s life, he does not develop and does not improve himself.
What then remains of himself?
Never focus solely on a girl. Всегда находи время для себя, своих друзей, занятий спортом, других увлечений. Твоя жизнь должна быть наполненной и разнообразной.
6. Планируй совместное будущее.
Девушкам очень важна уверенность в завтрашнем дне. Если мужчина ее не дает, отношения заканчиваются очень быстро. Запомни это простое правило и старайся применять его на практике.
Говори с ней о вашем общем будущем. Discuss where you will go to rest in the summer, what you will have in a year, as you see the further development of events.
Make such conversations from time to time or don't avoid them when the girl herself wants to talk about something like that. Try to include the word "we" in your speech, not "I."
7. Remember the changes.
When everything stands in one place, boredom comes in a relationship.
You must become a source of change that your girlfriend will certainly appreciate. Make you an example for her, so that she reaches for you, and you can teach her something.
Give her advice, take part in her life, do not be afraid to radically change something. If she doesn’t succeed, then do not criticize. Try to find a way out of this situation with her.
You must be an authority for her, a person with whom she is calm and not afraid of anything.
8. Eliminate jealousy and suspicion.
No need to harass your girlfriend with or without. Do not bother her with calls, control and monitor her every step.
Such behavior only kills relationships. You must learn to trust and somehow cope with your attacks of jealousy.
Any person needs freedom and personal space. If you can’t give this to a girl, then it’s quite natural that she will get tired. Learn to be more restrained, control your emotional outbursts and not find fault with every little thing.
9. Take care of yourself.
Even if you have been together for a hundred years, this does not give you the right to hammer on yourself and not to monitor your appearance.
Sweatpants and a stretched alcoholic shirt are not the best clothes for home. The girl wants to see a tidy and neat man next to her.
Do not stop watching yourself, go to the gym. Keep an eye on your hair style and dress. Your things should always be clean and ironed.
Your girlfriend may be too delicate to hint to you that you have not looked very good lately.
10. Do not forget about sex.
One of the most important points, in my opinion. Relationships in which there is no sex are dead relationships. Do not expect a miracle if the last time you were in bed a month and a half ago.
The girl may not show. But, in fact, for her it is as important as for you.
Who ever came up with this stupid myth that women don't need sex? Make sure that it is regular with you, so that not only you, but also she gets pleasure.
11. Let her be a little girl.
In every, even the most adult and serious woman, a child lives. Which it is very important for her to sometimes let out. And not all men are able to understand this and play along with such a state.
If your girlfriend wants to fool around or play with you, do not refuse her this desire. Show that you like it too.
There is nothing better for a girl if she feels weak next to her man. This means that she believes him one hundred percent. He believes in him, knows that he will solve all problems, support her, will always be there.
It is for this feeling that all women are hunting. Become a support for your girlfriend, a strong shoulder, an adviser.
I am sure these tips will help you build a relationship.
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