Job interview, party or date. The ability to quickly please others is much more useful than you might imagine. An excellent first impression allows you to achieve success in your career, finding friends and establishing a personal life. A good impression allows you to be popular among men and beautiful girls.
They say that the first impression is the most accurate and true. The first impression is made in 7 seconds. It can be an interview, a party or a date. It often happens that there is simply no second chance. Some people manage to make a good first impression easily and naturally, while others are more difficult. But to make a good first impression is not at all difficult if you know some of the tricks of professionals.
50 tricks to make a good first impression
1. Be sure to smile
2. Do not wait until you are interested, but take the first step yourself
3. Shake your hand firmly and confidently
4. Do not be afraid to say hello to a person first
5. Behave confidently, but not as a self-confident bouncer
6. Keep your back straight and your posture beautiful and confident.
7. Always look appropriate. Dress better than the situation requires
8. Your appearance should always be neat, tidy and even impeccable.
9. Watch your wardrobe, hairdo, bristles, nails and body odor
10. Keep your teeth snow-white and keep your breath fresh
11. Be calm, don't scamper and don't be nervous
12. Remember the person’s name and say a name a couple of times in a conversation
13. Look into the eyes of the interlocutor, do not be distracted and do not look away
14. Control the voice, intonation, timbre. Keep your voice confident and firm
15. Relax, so that the interlocutor feels the naturalness of the situation.
16. Behave nobly, help others and especially girls
17. Behave in a friendly and positive manner.
18. Look at yourself from the side of other people's eyes and adjust your behavior
40. Try to look active and sporty - everyone likes it
These simple ways will help you make a good and great first impression. Too much depends on this in a career and personal life to ignore. Keep it in your memory to be ready always.
25 phrases that work wonders (especially for introverts)
The word "cordiality" balances on the verge of two meanings - "sincere love and kindness" and "formal politeness", representing something in between.
Demonstrating cordiality is easy - it makes a positive impression and sets the tone for further conversation.
Remember the very phrases that you were taught, starting from kindergarten:
1. “HELLO”, “HELLO”, “GOOD MORNING”, “GOODBYE”.
Yes, yes, start with the simplest things, because many people don’t even bother with this.
2. "I am glad to see you."
I love this phrase as a greeting, because it is not just politeness, but politeness with additional meaning (you can accrue extra points for “I am ALWAYS glad to see you”).
It will work and when you meet new people, just change it to: "I am very happy to meet you."
Being polite doesn't cost anything. These words are striking in their absence.
Or any phrase by which you subtly hint that you would like to do a small favor for someone.
5. "ALWAYS PLEASE", "NOT FOR WHAT", "TO YOUR SERVICES".
It is a bad habit to say, “No problem,” instead of “Please contact,” in response to expressing gratitude. Using this phrase enhances the positive response to your words.
6. “DOCTOR”, “PROFESSOR”, “OFFICER”, etc.
We live in an informal world. But if someone received a diploma or a position with a title, believe me, he made a lot of efforts to achieve this position and improve his skills.
Therefore, refer to a person according to his rank at least once during a conversation. Even if he answers, “Oh no, please call me just Bill,” he will certainly appreciate it.
Cordiality is the first step, and many are able to take it. But remember, how many times have you been to any event or in a social situation, where the conversation broke off after a mutual “hello”?
To go a little further, think about what most people like to talk about more than anything else? Of course, about ourselves. So give them that opportunity. They will gladly open to you.
7. "COULD YOU NOT TELL ME ABOUT ...".
Tell me what? About anything! Where did you buy this jacket? What kind of transport did you get here? Where did you spend your best vacation? Who are you meeting tonight?
Give your interlocutor a chance to start talking about who he is, what he wants, what he believes in, or what he has experienced.
8. “I HEARED THAT YOU HAVE A BEAUTIFUL HISTORY ABOUT ...”
Obviously, this will only work if you actually know something that the other person would like to share.
This is effective, because you let the other person understand that they are really interested in what you are asking about and want to know more about it.
9. "THIS IS JOHN, IT IS PERFECTLY UNDERSTANDED IN ..."
Of course, in this case, you must introduce the person to a third party, and this phrase creates feelings.
You focus on the person, attracting the attention of everyone around him. For some people, no compliment is better.
Recognition is related to interest, but also adds a component to your reaction. You not only make it clear to a person that you are interested in him, but also certify that he was able to impress you. This removes one of the darkest fears that plagues many: that we have no influence on other people.
Each of these phrases, when used sincerely, shows the interlocutor that his value in your eyes is great. How can a person not respond to this positively?
10. “I AM IMPRESSED AS YOU ARE ...”
Complete this sentence in any way appropriate to the situation.
- If you are a little familiar with a person, you can say that he impressed you by the fact that he always has a lot of interesting stories in stock, or he always eats healthy food in the office.
- You do not know him at all? Then you can be impressed by his manner of elegantly carrying a bag and coat at the same time.
- Just try to make out something interesting in the interlocutor and tell him about it.
11. "YOU MAYBE EVEN DO NOT REPRESENT YOURSELF THAT ..."
It looks like the last expression squared. We all wonder what other people think of us.
Other similar phrases: "People like that you ..." or "I would like to learn how to dress (make deals, be able to communicate, etc.) as well as you."
12. "I HAVE INVITED TO YOUR OFFER AND ..."., "I FOLLOWED YOUR ADVICE AND .."
- If you’ve talked to anyone before, it will work great. For example, you took his advice, returned to the university and received a master's degree.
- And if you have never met before, Appreciate his advice to try baking with crab meat.
People like to give advice that others try to follow, especially if they are satisfied with the result.
13. "YOU WERE RIGHT."
Everyone wants to hear it. Take a breath and admit that the other person came up with a really good idea. Let them see that you think they were right and they will like you even more.
14. "I DID NOTICE HOW GOOD YOU ..."
You can rely on key phrases from the previous section: "You are well versed in ... I think that you could be even better in ...".
15. "I THINK YOU CAN DO IT BETTER."
On the one hand, this is a statement of the fact that regardless of the results that a person achieved, he did not do enough. But on the other hand, it sounds like a vote of confidence.
16. "HMM, INTERESTING, HOW WILL WE SOLVE THIS?".
Focus on solidarity - you and your partner are part of the team.
You can effectively use this phrase with people you know well and with whom we work (“How are we going to attract more customers?”), And with those you just met at a party (“How would we get to the bar ? ").
This may seem a little illogical, but by setting limits on what you are willing to do for others, you will make them respect you more. These phrases will help you avoid circumstances in which you do not want to end up, and not promise something that you cannot fulfill.
17. "THANKS BUT I CAN'T."
Everyone will easily understand this. Thank you for a date or offer to go to work on the weekend or play a trick on that guy - I just can't do it.
18. "SIMPLY TO INSTALL ADEQUATE EXPECTATIONS ...".
I sometimes feel that I use this phrase ten times a day. We often succeed in small projects, but I don’t want others to assume that we always work so brilliantly. Better to exceed expectations than make high promises.
19. “I WOULD NOT LIKE TO GIVE OVER PROMISES ...”
We already talked about this.
Learn to say no and act in accordance with your words - this will lift you up a notch or two higher in people's eyes.
When everything else fails, eternal optimism multiplies strength. Energetic people infect others with their positive attitude.
21. “WHY AND NO?”
I would like to sell more to customers in the Caribbean ... I would like my boss to let me work from home on Fridays ... I would like to go back to college and get a doctor’s diploma ...
An enthusiastic listener will ask you only one question: “Why not? Let's try to do it! ”
At any moment, almost everyone can be congratulated on something. This is another chance to demonstrate recognition of the efforts of another person, with enthusiasm, joy and a smile.
23. "TELL MORE ABOUT ...".
If I want you to tell me more, I am interested and passionate about what you say. You will treat me a little better in gratitude for this question.
You can provide support by offering a fallback option or creating an atmosphere of psychological comfort - it depends on the circumstances. Anyway, we appreciate when people tell us that they are ready to cover us.
24. "I BELIEVE IN YOU", "WE TOGETHER."
We all need to hear this - especially when we are not very confident in ourselves. Solidarity is a wonderful thing.
25. "I WOULD LIKE TO MEET YOU WITH ..".
Each time we introduce one person to another, this is a kind of conclusion of the transaction. We assume and hope that new acquaintances will find each other interesting and valuable. We invest social capital in their relationships - this is what people notice and value.
As you have noticed, in all seven circles of communication - hospitality, interest, recognition, problems, enthusiasm, limitations and support - the secret is to convey a positive message that causes a positive reaction. Take the first move, and you will quickly come up with your own continuation of these phrases. published by econet.ru.
P.S. And remember, just changing our consciousness - together we change the world! © econet
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Change the behavior to change the attitude
It is believed that it is impossible to make a good impression if you are negative about yourself. So, millions of people on the planet are doomed to make a disgusting first impression due to low self-esteem? Not if they resort to one trick. It’s worth changing the behavior, how the attitude will change. In other words, if you pretend that you are not afraid, the fear will actually go away.
Start smiling, and you will gradually feel confidence come.
Do not strive for the ideal. It is not necessary to become a charismatic leader or soul of a company in order to communicate and feel the joy of communication. The ideal is the enemy of the good.
Dress comfortably, but according to the situation
The desire to stand out with the help of an unusual appearance or, conversely, not to change yourself and your beloved sweater with deer can ruin the first impression. If you decide to join the masses and make acquaintances, try dressing like everyone else. An informal outfit or cozy stretched trainings at an IT conference will attract public attention, but they will not do good to you. Leave your favorite afterparty look.
Do not force yourself to love people
A common psychological misconception: to make a good first impression, you need to be positive towards others. But most of them have negative experiences with Homo sapiens. “The more I know people, the more I love dogs” - a good half of the planet’s inhabitants are ready to sign this phrase.
Do not force yourself to truly love others. To make a good impression, it is enough to be positive in relation to the one with whom you are communicating at the moment. This does not mean a hot hug and long handshakes. Imagine that you play the role of a person who likes these people.
Do not start the conversation first if you do not want
Another standard tip is to start the conversation first. But if it’s difficult for you, forget it. Just show openness: a slight smile on your lips, a body in a relaxed (but not cheeky) pose, a friendly look. Non-verbal signs will show others that you are ready to talk.
Nonverbal Communication Tips:
- Stand or sit, leaning slightly towards the other person.
- Mirror speech speed and posture.
- Touch the elbow of the person you are talking to at the right time. An American psychologist and author of the book “First Impression” Ann Demarais suggests touching the person’s elbow, pointing to something.
If the conversation is started by another person, and not you, the principle of commitment is triggered and the initiator of the conversation subconsciously feels the need to "invest" in dialogue and acquaintance.
Let your interlocutor understand that he is important and valuable.
A simple way to please another person is to show him his significance. And this is not only flattery and praise. Usually advised to meet their strengths when meeting. Try differently: do not show off.
The more modest you look against the background of others, the better others feel and the better they start to relate to you.
Many in conversation want to immediately show their knowledge and experience. But to start the conversation, another option is suitable: ask the opinion of the interlocutor on some issue and do not suppress your knowledge. Just do not overdo it: no one likes humiliation and creep.
Look for like-minded people
Finding out if a person is your like-minded person is simple. Start with unobtrusive questions about work or the political situation in the country. Did the answer resonate in the shower? Continue communication. If not, change the subject or interlocutor. Do not try to convince a person - this will spoil the first impression of you.
Practical minimum. Where to begin?
Listen and pay attention to the emotional message of the interlocutor. It is advisable to contact people by name, but not too often. You can start a conversation with a remark on a general topic - about the event, speakers, participants and so on. End it with a question, for example: “This is the first time I am at such a large-scale conference. Do you know who the organizer is? ”
Listen carefully to the answer. If no questions were asked about you, briefly tell about yourself (no more than 30 seconds). Or ask a question that is supposed to be the personal answer of the interlocutor. For example: “Where are you from?” One may ask something about work. After exchanging a pair of replicas, you can proceed to communicate with other people.
1. The Pygmalion Effect
The famous psychologist Robert Rosenthal called the Pygmalion effect a phenomenon in which a person, being sure of something, acts so as to find real confirmation of this.
If we are sure in advance that Marya Ivanovna is not a very pleasant lady and that she won’t succeed in charming her, we will unconsciously act in such a way as to confirm this. Therefore, it is better to tune in to the fact that the person with whom you will be acquainted will be glad to see you.
And something else. Based on this effect, an experiment was conducted during which it was proved: if a person believes that he is attractive to you, then he begins to behave more openly and friendly. So, if there is an opportunity, let somebody tell Marya Ivanovna before your meeting that you already like her.
2. The Pratfell Effect
Often in the company of unfamiliar people, we try to show ourselves from the best side. We are worried, we are trying to hide it, we are even more worried, and as a result we are hiding in a corner, dreaming of faster being at home in our favorite bed. Here psychologists recommend taking into account the Pratfell effect, according to which the best way to win the favor of others is to show vulnerability, weakness, slight oversight.
In this regard, we could not help but recall the talented Jennifer Lawrence, who fell for three years in a row in front of almost the whole world, but her popularity did not suffer from this at all, but even vice versa. Although, of course, the talent of the actress played a decisive role in this.
3. The effect of attraction similarities
Этот термин принадлежит психологу Теодору Ньюкомбу, установившему в ходе своего исследования, что чем больше у людей общих взглядов и привычек, тем сильнее они нравятся друг другу. Особенно интересно то, что большую симпатию вызывают собеседники, с кем у нас есть сходство в отрицательных чертах. Дело за малым: найти эти точки соприкосновения, ведь мало кто при знакомстве начинает с ходу рассказывать о себе, тем более о своих недостатках.
4. Точки соприкосновения
Vanessa van Edwards, the author of The Science of Communication, compares our thoughts with tangles, and general topics for conversation with connecting strings. She thinks that There are three main categories of topics for communicating with unfamiliar people. To start a conversation, you need a phrase that opens this topic and that same connecting “thread”. We will tell you what this means, for example, Maria Ivanovna, to whom you came to the anniversary.
- People Category - mutual acquaintances, that is, her son, say, Paul. Opening phrase: “Paul has a great ear for music.”
Thread: “And what talents do you have?”
- Category "Context" - the event that connected you, that is, the anniversary. Opening phrase: “Great restaurant!”
Thread: "Who advised him to you?"
- Interests Category - Actually, interests.
Opening phrase: “I saw your photos from Greece.”
Thread: “What did you like most there?”
Pay attention to the strings-questions: they should not be closed, that is, suggest answers “yes” or “no” if you want to talk to the interlocutor.
5. Talking about yourself
5 different studies have confirmed: people like to talk about themselves (not so much about skeletons in the closet, but about personal experience). At such moments in humans, a brain zone is activated, which scientists call the pleasure center (she is responsible for the feeling of pleasure). Moreover, in one experiment, participants refused a monetary reward in favor of the opportunity to talk about themselves.
Therefore, after the contact is established, it is important to help the interlocutor to share his ideas or opinions, asking leading questions and showing interest in what he is telling.